Waiter?

Adam: “… I specifically ordered the number 17, A Month Of Leisure.”

Waiter: “Yes, I can see that Sir is more than halfway through it.”

Adam: “Well, yes, but the problem is …”

Waiter: “Would Sir like to send it back, and order another one? July, perhaps?”

Adam: “Well, that’s not really possible, and you see, the problem with this month of leisure is, bluntly, that there hasn’t really been very much leisure in it. Take a look.”

« Waiter inspects the wispy remnants of June still on Adam’s plate »

Adam: “I specifically ordered June as my Month Of Leisure because July will be filled with frenzy, packing, moving, and dealing with moving three cats to a city where they won’t be allowed to go outside and kill chipmunks. June was to be filled with sunny days, temperate nights, swimming in the pond, reading books, lazy conversations with my wife over glasses of iced tea, and generally having my feet up.”

Waiter: “I can see a little of that sort of thing, here.”

Adam: “There’s been a lot of fun stuff, don’t get me wrong: the Back to School party; the trip to New York to go apartment hunting; the trip home to Wisconsin to see my folks and my brother; planning for parties and get-togethers; starting to triage our belongings into the three big categories: “NYC”, “Storage,” “Buh-Bye Now;” having various family visits; and so on… But you’ll note that there really hasn’t been that much in the way of me having my feet up.”

Waiter: “…”

Adam: “Yes?”

Waiter: “Sir does have a modicum of self-awareness, no?”

Adam: “A little, sure.”

Waiter: “Sir knows that Sir has, pretty much since Sir first started shaving, had more things that he wanted to do than he had time for? And that while having a job held a good number of To-Do items at bay, the removal of said job was never going to make every item on the list disappear as well? And that while Sir said that he wanted a month of leisure, the person who actually wound up pounding on the ketchup bottle of “Things To Do” and dumping its contents all over June was not, actually, the Kitchen, but rather Sir himself? I’m sure the security cameras captured it quite clearly.”

Adam: « hangs his head for a second, then looks up, curious. » “… wait, you’ve got security cameras inside the restaurant?”

Waiter: “Enjoy the rest of your June, sir.”

«Adam twirls a french fry in the pile of To-Do on his plate, munches it thoughtfully, turns to the audience»

Adam: “Of course, this tastes pretty good, too, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.”

FIN