Turmeric and Occam's Razor

… says, paraphrased, that the simplest explanation for things is generally right. Here are some explanations for things where, I’m hoping, Occam (or “William of Ockham ,” per Wikipedia) is getting it wrong.

  * Piper is sneaking out of the bedroom while we're asleep and eating fistfuls of turmeric.
  * Piper is sneaking out of the bedroom while we're asleep and telling the cats to steer clear of her or she'll use this shiv, understand?
  * Water, especially lukewarm water on washcloths, is actually highly corrosive to babies and burns, yes, my precious, like acid on their skin.
  * Breastmilk served out of a bottle tastes like an ashtray-flavored Italian soda.
  * Eons ago, only the young of our species who ripped the most chest hair from their fathers survived and thrived.
  * Repeatedly whacking yourself in the face feels awesome and looks great!

Off to find some bleach for these brilliant-orange-stained diapers. Seriously, now, wtf.