Great Truths

Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have learned

 No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
 When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
 If your sister hits you, don't hit her back.  They always catch the
second person.
Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
 You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
 Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
 Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
 Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
 Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
 School lunches stick to the wall.
 You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
 Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.


 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER A KID

 You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
 You can live without sex but not without glasses.
 Your back goes out more than you do.
 You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the
 room.
 You buy a compass for the dash of your car.
 You are proud of your lawn mower.
 You call Olan Mills before they call you.
 Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
 You sing along with the elevator music.
 You would rather go to work than stay home sick.
 You constantly talk about the price of gasoline.
 You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
 You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
 You make an appointment to see the dentist.
 You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
 Neighbors borrow your tools.
 People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you ?"
 You have a dream about prunes.
 You answer a question with, "because I said so!"
 You send money to PBS.
 The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.
 You take a metal detector to the beach.
 You know what the word "equity" means.
 You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch
television.
 You talk about "good grass" and you're referring to someone's lawn.
 You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
 You got cable for the weather channel.
 You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
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C l a u d i a     M o r g a n		pzbetna@argrtevgl.pbz
Manager of Human Resources
Netegrity, Inc.				http://www.netegrity.com
245 Winter St.
Waltham, MA  02154
TEL: 781.890.1700
FAX: 781.487.7791
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