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Evolution and Alabama

08/25/1998



>From AIR (Annals of Improbable Research)

1998-08-10      Evolution and Alabama

Last month's Scientific Correctness Survey asked:

        Some people, including Alabama Governor Fob James,
        claim that Darwin's theory of evolution is dead wrong.
        This month's question is: Did human beings evolve from
        ape-like creatures?
        __Yes __No   __Not in Alabama   __Other (please specify)

The votes poured in, especially from Alabama. The final result:

        59% said yes
        03% said No
        62% said Not in Alabama
        54% said Other, sometimes quite emphatically.

Many respondents cast votes for multiple categories. One 
respondent mailed us a photograph of his brother. Several 
respondents from Alabama described an "educational ape imitation" 
that Governor James once performed in front of the state 
legislature. All in all, many things were made clear. Here are 
some of them.

Investigator Sherry McDonald:
        "Yes...Darwin was right and the governor is in denial."

Investigator  Hershl Hartman:
        "Where in the Bible does it say that? Certainly not in Gen. 
1:27 'A male and female He created them' or in Gen 2:22 'And Yave 
Elohim fashioned the rib that he had taken from the man into a 
woman.' With such clear evidence before us, how can Darwin 
possibly be right?"

Investigator John Wilson:
        "Since the question is inspired, if we can use that word, by 
a government official, the answer "yes" is close enough for 
government work."

Investigator Richard Platel:
        "I cannot understand the continuing controversy over this 
issue. It is obvious to any rational person that if two groups of 
people hold strong, opposing viewpoints, then the truth must lie 
precisely between them (this is a well known mathematical 
theorem.) Obviously then, dumb animals evolved up to a certain 
point, at which time, a divine being created humans."

Investigator Anthony Kinney:
        "The correct answer is some human beings (Homo sapiens) 
evolved from apes. Fob James and others (Homo amoebo) evolved 
directly from unicellular organisms and they are now using that 
cell for brains."

Investigator Raymond Craig Thompson:
        "No! Human beings were created as was all life on earth. 
There has been no proof found supporting the theory of evolution, 
but to the contrary all things point towards creation being the 
only feasible answer to where life came from."

Oddly named investigator Alan B:
        "We still are ape like creatures. Evolution would be a good 
idea right now."

-- 

-b

Bob Antia                                                nagvn@pburfvir.pbz
Cohesive Security Solutions                         http://www.cohesive.com
PGP fingerprint                    9B70 FF2D 03CC 5FC1  3E29 6ED4 1679 44A8



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