Fri. afternoon OS humor

IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN THE AIRLINES
                 - Submitted by J. Hovind
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UNIX Airways

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
airport.  They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by
piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
building.

Air DOS

Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and
let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again,
jump
on again, and so on ...

Mac Airlines

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look
and act exactly the same.  Every time you ask questions about details, you
are
gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so
just shut up.

Windows Air

The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy
baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off.  After about 10 minutes
in
the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Air

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and
takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

Linux Air

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start
their own airline.  They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the
runways
themselves.  They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.  When
you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy
of the seat-HOWTO.html.  Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very
comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on time without a single
problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful.  You try to tell customers of the
other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
what with the seat?"