FFYAYou might be a redneck jedi if... (fwd)

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>---------- Forwarded message ----------
>
>You might be a redneck jedi if...
>
>Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
>
>You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm
>Strawberry Hill.
>
>You think the best use of your light saber is picking your teeth.
>
>At least one wing of your x-wing is primer colored.
>
>There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
>
>You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
>
>You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok
>
>You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
>
>You think that stormtroopers are just KKK members with really good sheets.
>
>A peaceful meditation session is one without gas.
>
>You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE FORCE.
>
>Your master ever said, "My finger you will pull...Hmmm?"
>
>You have ever had an x-wing up on blocks in your yard.
>
>You ever lost a hand during a light saber fight because you had to spit.
>
>The worst part of spending time on Dagoba is the dadgum skeeters.
>
>Wookies are offended by your B.O.
>
>You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't
>have to wait for a commercial.
>
>You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
>
>You have ever used a light saber to clean fish or open a non-twist-off
>bottle of beer.
>
>Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son, come on over t' the dark
>side... it'll be a hoot."
>
>You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingie
>to get the bar-b-q grill to light.
>

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