Stupid People tricks (fwd)

[multiple forwards deleted, since the original attribution is long gone...]
 
> Human "genius" at work:
> I worked with an Individual who plugged her power strip back into
> itself  and  for the life of her could not understand why her system would not
> turn  on.
> 
> 1st Person: "Do you know anything about this fax-machine?"
> 2nd Person:  "A little.  What's wrong?"
> 1st Person: "Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say
> all  she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and
> the  same thing happened."
> 2nd Person: How did you load the sheet?"
> 1st Person: "It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone
> else to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it
> and read it."
> 
> I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.  "Do you
> need some help?" I asked.  She replied, "I knew I should have replaced
> the battery in this remote door unlocker-now I can't get into my car.  Do
> you think they [pointing to a distant convenience store] would have a
> battery for this?"  "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I 
> asked.   "No, just this remote 'thingy,'" she answered, handing it 
> and the car keys to me.
> As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't
> you drive over there and check about the batteries - it's a long walk."
> 
> Tech Support:  "What does the screen say now?"
> Person:  "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
> Tech Support:  "Well?"
> Person:  "How do I know when it's ready?
> 
> My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his
> address from Texas to Vermont. The woman who took the call asked where
> Vermont was.  As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said, "Look,
>  I'm  not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?"
> 
> Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift.  One day he
> was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing
> paper. What do I do?"  "Just use copier machine paper," she told him.   With
> that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
> photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.
> 
> I was working the help desk.  One day one of the computer operators
> called me and asked if anything "bad" would happen if she dropped coins into
> the openings of her PC.  I asked her if this was something she was thinking
> of  doing.  She said, "never mind" and hung up.  So I got out my trusty
> tool kit and paid her a visit.  I opened her CPU case and sure enough -
> there was 40  cents.
> 
> One of our servers crashed.  I was watching our new system
> administrator trying to restore it.  He inserted a CD and needed 
> to type a path name to a directory named "i386".  He started to 
> type  it and paused, asking me,  "Where's the key for that line 
> thing?"  I  asked what he was talking about, and he said, "You 
> know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation
>  mark."  I replied, "You mean the letter "i"?" and he said, "Yeah,
> that's  it!"
> 
> This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. 
>  Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making 
>  it impossible  to move the lamp while the cord was attached. He 
>  decided to cut the cord, since the lamp  was unusable anyway.  He 
>  didn't remember to unplug it first.  I found him in  the hallway 
>  rolling back and forth.
> 
> I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motor home was towed
> into the garage.  The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair
> and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked
> the manager what had happened.  He told me that the driver had set the
> cruise control, then went back to make a sandwich.
> 
> I called a company and asked to speak to Bob.  The person who answered
> said, "Bob is on vacation.  Would you like to hold?"
> 
> Here's the set up:
> I rented a movie from Blockbuster.  Before the movie begins a message
> comes on the screen saying, "This movie has been altered to fit your
> television  screen."  Comment from person: "How do they know what 
> size  screen I have?"
> 
> 


-- 
Aliza R. Panitz   http://www.ability.net/~buglady/  ohtynql@novyvgl.arg

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